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Shady Shefik
>>> "Your wife's a whore," and "we hope your kid dies of cancer." Compliments of a group of agitated soccer fans in England, bumper sticker manufacturers now have some new and exciting catch phrases for their next product line. Directed towards Victoria Adams and her husband, England and Manchester United soccer star David Beckham, the brazen comments have left the couple in a depressed state. "I get down and depressed just like anybody else," says Adams, who is better known as Posh Spice of The Spice Girls. "I try not to let it upset me, but I am only human." It kind of makes you want to cry doesn't it? No? Well, I did say kind of. This incident reminds me of the movie, The Elephant Man. "It is a horrible thing to happen," she says. (Yeah, it's absolutely tragic, but at least now we all know that you're "not an animal." Well, maybe.) Perhaps all this tragedy was the inspiration for Adams to insanely venture off into a musical project outside of The Spice Girls, which so happens to be a dance record called "Out Of Your Mind." Set for release in July, the song is a crazy collaboration with Dane Bowers of Another Level. Continuing in her newly explored "mentally disturbed" motif, she adds these comforting words to harness the intensity of the motif's mind-blowing powers: "I don't need to carry on making music." (And, she's right, because we don't need her too either.) But, nevertheless, she says that she "loves" doing it. (Well, at least one person "loves" it.) She then adds, "If no one likes my records, then I'll just go back to what I was doing years ago, singing to myself and leaping around the living room." She should start making her way into her living room now...
>>> Pillaged from her own living room, artifacts belonging to 18 year-old Britney Spears will soon be finding its way into a special wing of The Kentwood Museum, which is located in her hometown of Kentwood, Louisiana. The town, which has a population of only 2,600, has enthusiastically decided to permanently devote a section of their beloved museum to their beloved songbird. Despite their valiant efforts to build a shrine for Spears, I still won't be planning to stop at Kentwood, Louisiana on my next vacation. Tentatively scheduled to open early next year, the section will feature a nauseating spectrum of Britney Spears memorabilia. "We're a small community," says Sandy Reed, a resident of Kentwood, who has been coordinating the project with councilwoman Kathy Bryan. "Everybody just loves Britney." (Yeah, that's because she's probably related to everbody in the town.) "I think most of her fans would agree," says Rajiv Doshi, founder of the web-site http://www.britneyspears.org. "It's about time she got her own museum." (I tend to disagree. Spears has hardly breathed long enough in the music industry to warrant this kind of honor.) "It will show people that she has had a huge impact on our culture already, and will continue to, because she is here to stay," adds Doshi. Christina Aguilera, Brandy, Monica, Aaliyah, Jessica Simpson, and Mandy Moore must all be frantically calling their hometown museums right about now. All this obsession reminds me of the movie, Dumb & Dumber. Sounds a little psychotic to me...
>>> But, is it psychotic enough to remind me of the movie Psycho? Not quite, but Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones does. After buying an apartment in London, next door to his former wife, supermodel Jerry Hall, Jagger desperately waited until she went away, just so he could conveniently "knock a hole" into her dining room. But, maybe Jagger didn't know beforehand that he didn't have to tear down walls, just to get a good look at Hall. Everyone will be able to get a good enough look, when she appears naked next month in the London stage version of The Graduate. She will be taking over the role of Mrs. Robinson, which was previously held by Kathleen Turner. "I can't get rid of him," Hall says. "I'm making him move. I said to him, 'Look, it's eleven months, and you've got to get your own place.'" Perhaps he could move in with Brazilian model Luciana Morad, who Jagger had an affair and "love child" with, while he was still married to Hall. Despite her anger towards Jagger, Hall still holds him in a good light, proudly stating that "he's not a bad person at all. He's not mean. He's very generous. He's got a good heart." Yeah, isn't that what they said about Norman Bates, until he started dressing up like his mother...
>>> Did you have something shady to tell me? Then, stop procrastinating, and send me an e-mail at ShadyShefik@aol.com!
© 2000 Knight Entities, Inc
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